Hey, I’m Kayla. I actually built a dating site, ran it, broke it, patched it, and kept going. This is my plain review of the tools I used, what I did step by step, and the real stuff that happened. Yes, with numbers.
If you’d like to dive even deeper into the exact wins and wipeouts, my full case-study lives over on Website Builder Awards.
Quick outline (so you can see the path)
- Niche and name
- Tools I used (with pros and cons)
- Build steps with real examples
- Money, time, and traffic
- What flopped vs what worked
- Simple plan you can copy
Why I Built It (and the little twist)
I live in a mid-size city. Cute, but people don’t always meet. So I made a niche dating site for dog owners. I called it Paws & People. Cheesy? Yes. But it stuck. Folks smiled when they heard it. That helped.
I aimed for one thing: kind, small, and safe. Not a swipe storm. More like, “Hey, want to walk by the river at 5?”
Tools I Used (honest review, from my hands)
I tried two builds: a no-code start, then a more custom setup.
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Bubble (no-code)
- What I liked: I built my first version in 3 weeks. The drag-and-drop was simple. I shipped fast.
- Pain points: The app slowed when I had more than 800 daily users. Also, custom chat felt clunky.
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WordPress + Plugins (my second build)
- Theme: SweetDate
- Plugins: BuddyPress (profiles), Paid Memberships Pro (plans), CometChat (chat), Stripe (payments), Twilio (SMS), SendGrid (email), Mapbox (maps)
- What I liked: Cheaper month to month. More control. Fast enough with caching.
- Pain points: Plugins fought each other. I had one week where chat broke after an update. Fun times.
Costs I actually paid:
- Domain: $12/year (Namecheap)
- Bubble plan: $32/month for MVP
- WordPress hosting: $15/month (SiteGround)
- CometChat: $49/month
- Stripe fees: 2.9% + 30¢ per charge
- Twilio SMS: about $18 first month
- SendGrid: free at first, then $19.95/month
You know what? Shipping fast with Bubble helped. Moving to WordPress helped me breathe when costs grew.
If you’re still weighing your platform options, skim Wix’s step-by-step guide on how to build a dating website for a quick overview of the must-have features, and then peek at Elementor’s detailed tutorial on creating a dating website with WordPress to see how those same features plug into a more flexible stack.
If you want a side-by-side comparison of the most popular site builders (scores, costs, speed), check out the latest rankings on Website Builder Awards. That tinkering addiction runs deep—I even built a cleaning company website six different ways just to see what actually converts (the full breakdown is here).
Building It: What I Did, Step by Step
1) Pick a niche, then write a 1-sentence promise
Mine: Meet kind dog people near you. Walks, coffee, real talk.
2) Landing page first (one clear button)
- Headline: Meet dog people who get you.
- Subhead: No spam. No stress. Walks > swipes.
- One button: “Join Free.” That’s it.
I kept a short waitlist for two weeks. I got 241 emails from flyers and a TikTok video. No fancy tricks.
3) Profiles that feel human, not homework
Fields I used (worked well):
- Age range
- City, distance willing to travel
- Dog size (small, medium, big)
- Park days (M/T/W/Th/F/Sa/Su)
- Are you shy or chatty?
- Dealbreakers (smoking, wants kids, politics)
- Quick prompts:
- “My dog’s weird habit is…”
- “Sunday looks like…”
- “Text me if you love…”
Photos: 4–6 max. I learned more photos didn’t help. People froze.
4) Simple “match math” (no big words)
I gave points, like this:
- Same city: +5
- Within 10 miles: +3
- Same park day: +2
- Same dog size: +2
- Two shared answers on prompts: +3
Then I sorted by the total. It felt fair. Folks said, “The feed makes sense.” That’s a win.
5) Search and filters people used
They loved:
- Distance
- Park day
- Dog size
They didn’t care about: - Star sign (I tried it; it flopped)
I got some of the distance-first inspiration by looking at how hyper-local classified dating boards organize their posts; scrolling through the Vineland section of Skip The Games—full breakdown here—shows how location tags are front-and-center, which is a useful reminder to surface proximity filters early and keep the user focused on nearby matches.
6) Chat that lowers stress
I turned off read receipts. I added a “slow mode” switch. It limits messages to four per person per day. Why? People told me they felt safer with fewer messages at once. Wild, right? But it worked.
7) Safety from day one (this saved me)
- Selfie check: You hold up two fingers. A mod (me + two friends on weekends) confirmed.
- Word filter: Bad or gross words got flagged. Three flags = auto lock for review.
- Photo checker: Nudity filter on uploads (yes, it saw stuff I didn’t want to see).
- Report button: Always visible, one tap.
- Trust bar: “Verified by selfie” showed on profiles. It boosted replies by 23%.
The reason I doubled-down on image screening is simple: once a private photo slips into the wrong hands it’s out there for good—just browse this gallery of real leaked nudes for a stark reminder—and you’ll instantly see why proactive filters and tight human moderation are non-negotiable for any community built on trust.
8) Payments and plans
Free plan:
- See profiles
- Send likes
- 1 new chat per day
Plus plan ($9/month):
- See who liked you
- 3 super likes per day
- Change city any time
- Priority in the feed
Money needs to be simple. No tricks.
Real Numbers (no fluff)
Launch weekend:
- 47 signups
- 4 paid users
- $36 in revenue
Month 2 (after local events and TikTok):
- 1,204 signups total
- 3.9% paid
- $369 gross that month
- Stripe fees: about $13
- Refunds: 2 (one said they found someone; hey, that’s a good “problem”)
Engagement:
- Day-7 retention: 33% (came back one week later)
- Day-30 retention: 11%
- Average chats started per user: 1.4/week
- Slow mode turned on by: 41% of users
A sweet note: three couples wrote me. One got engaged. I cried in my kitchen. Not kidding.
What Flopped (learn from my mess)
- Swipe-only feed: People got tired. I switched to prompts + slow mode. Time in app went down, but real replies went up.
- Facebook login only: Big nope. I added email + Apple sign-in. Signups jumped 22%.
- Age check with credit card: Folks hated it. I used selfie check + ID on request instead.
- Pushy popups: “Upgrade now!” banners made people bounce. I cut them. Conversions stayed the same. Peace rose.
What Worked (do these first)
- Local events: I set a pop-up “Dog Walk Saturday.” I brought water bowls and free treats. I printed 200 flyers ($27). That weekend I got 119 signups.
- TikTok: A 15-second clip of two dogs meeting got 1,800 views, 92 clicks, $0 spend.
- Coffee shop boards: Old school, but strong.
- Referral nudge: Invite 3 friends, get one month of Plus. Cheap and clean.
My Ad Spend Review
- Instagram Story ads: $50 test. CPC was $0.78. Okay, not amazing.
- Google Ads: Didn’t convert well for me. People searched “free dating,” and bounced when they saw rules.
- Flyers + events: Best cost per signup by far. Real smiles beat fancy ads.
The Part Where It Broke
- Chat flood: One Friday, messages stalled. CometChat hit a limit; I hadn’t set proper tiers. I upgraded. Then I set a queue. After that, no pile-ups.
- SMS delays: Twilio codes